[Disclaimer: The content may be linguistically objectionable! Also, I don’t intend to hurt anyone’s sentiment. I love my Kanpuriya. Please take this one in a sporting spirit!]
Update: I married this guy last year. I am absolutely in awe of him. But I realized one thing – You can take a person out of Kanpur but can not take Kanpur out of a person. I enjoy it how Kanpur is a part of daily life now!
When you start dating, there are a lot of things that you might begin to notice in life, which you must not have done before. And when you date someone different from you, geographically, professionally or socially, you tend to stereotype some group of people.
I know this is complete stereotyping, but I couldn’t help myself but write this!
There are a plethora of blogs and articles on dating a Bengali guy/girl. Or maybe a Punjabi. Or a Tamil. Basically, the mapping of your region to your characteristics as a partner is very profound in the world today!
I have always thought Kanpur to be a small city with people living here hardly knowing anything. But then, I had to un-learn that in a completely different manner. I bumped into this guy from Kanpur and later on started dating him. And I realized that though the city is small, the people there are a lot smarter! And that is the only good thing I have to write about Kanpur! *kidding* Am I?
Before writing this, I started to research a bit to know how people think about dating someone from a region or community. I found about almost every place and community:
No offence, but some people date people from Bihar and blog about that too:
When I searched about people dating Kanpuriyas, all I could find was this:
I thought maybe this is the small city effect. So I replaced my search word with Uttar Pradesh. The results were exactly the same as above.
Now, I could jump onto a few conclusions:
1. Man, these people are horny AF!
2. People don’t date people from this city (or state for that matter!)
3. And if they do, they are too embarrassed to accept that publicly!
I admire people from Kanpur. For obvious reasons. That and also because I might get a kantaap if I don’t! I have a lot of friends from Kanpur. But when I started dating one, I realized that no matter if the guy is Punjabi or an IT guy or has been living in Delhi for more than a decade, he will always remain a Kanpuriya. Yes, his being from Kanpur is going to be the most striking feature of his.
Things that you will relate to if you are dating a guy from Kanpur:
1. You receive a lot of khaini, Zarda, Rajnigandhi etc. jokes and you know you are silently NOT relating them to your other half.
I could never understand the pan masala jokes earlier. But now I know that what Kanpuriyas is famous for. And trust me, even if you know that your other half is not one of these, you can not stop laughing!
2. You can not do even the most innocent of the things on this earth without looking dirty to your other half. Or to yourself. And start questioning your existence.
For example, enjoying an ice-candy. Period.
3. Your vocabulary improves. Improves to a different level altogether.
4. Kanpuriyas have a sweet tooth. They can have sweets in any quantity.
And no matter how much you make fun of Kanpur you have to agree that the desserts in Kanpur are the best. My personal favourites are the banarasi ke ladoo and badnaam kulfi.
View this post on Instagram
If you were a mirage, I would be the thirsty traveller Captivated by your illusion, I would wait for you to materialize faster. No kulfi can beat the Badnaam Kulfi of Kanpur. Thick and freshly swirled, this is the only thing for which I can go to the Manchester of the East everyday! #badnaam #kulfi #desserts #dessertlist #dessertagram #yummy #foodporn #foodgasm #indianfood #kanpur #sogood #MyDessertProject #sushmitamalakardotcom
5. The jokes around them are never-ending. And you know that the jokes are so true!!!
6. Speaking of jokes, the sense of humour of these guys is killing.
Yes, you would want to kill yourself. But then, the only thing you can do is just meekly laugh. At yourself. Out of pity.
Two ears fell in love…dono ke beech mast-ishq tha!
7. The love for Kanpur and its people is undying.
Yes, it is a small city but that doesn’t mean everyone knows everyone. No, I don’t stereotype to that extent. BUT that is true to some extent. All my friends from different social circle who is from Kanpur somehow know each other.
Not just that. They can magically sense other Kanpuriyas and can start a conversation. Anytime. Anywhere.
We went to a mall in Gurgaon for lunch once. The parking wala bhaiya happened to be from Kanpur and he recognized our car was from Kanpur too. Because UP 78, du-uh! He gave us the token for parking and then the conversation went ahead like this:Parking wale bhaiya: Arrey bhaiya, Kanpur se hain?Him: Haan bhaiya. Aap bhi?Parking wale bhaiya: Jee! Him: Bahute badhiya. Or btaye, sab badhiya hai?Parking wale bhaiya: Haan bhaiya ekdum.
I am sure if the car in the rear didn’t honk we might have had a company on our lunch date that day!
I don’t know if I will ever stop by to talk to anyone from Delhi or a Bengali, for that matter ever. Anyhow, these are a few things which I surely need to learn!
8. You have to go to Kanpur once just to believe that everything happens in a better way back in Kanpur.
I really used to think of Kanpur is a small city – nothing like Delhi. I have to admit. I was right. Kanpur seems far better!
But everything aside, people from Kanpur are really good at heart. And no one can validate it better than I can. And this is no consolation after the bashing which I did above. I am just stating a fact!
Do you have anything more to add to this? You can do it anonymously in the comment section if you wish to. Not everyone is as brave as I am in admitting the fact that they are dating someone from Kanpur!
And before I end this post, there is one last thing I want to add. When I started dating this guy, many people told me that the language used in Kanpur is pretty bad. Being from the anti-stereotyping squad, I did not believe it. Plus, my boyfriend is the epitome of sophistication so I never had this experience. But then, I came across this newspaper clipping to actually believe that!
’nuff said. #kthankbai