5 Misconceptions About IIT JEE That You Should Know And Avoid

Those who aspire to study engineering in India have one main aim – to land a seat in one of the premier IITs in the country. However, to get admitted to these institutes they have to cross a big hurdle which is appearing for the IIT Joint Entrance Exam. This entrance exam which is conducted on a national level is one of the most popular as well as challenging exams in India. While the exam is important for many students, there are some preconceived notions or misconceptions about this exam.

There is a lot of wrong information that is passed around and this significantly adds to the existing pressure that students face. Sometimes budding aspirants even back out as they get carried away by the misconceptions and fail to make judicious decisions. In this article, we have tried to bring out some of the most common misconceptions that students should know about. They should ignore these and deviate away from such a notion. When they do that, they will be able to prepare more effectively for the exam.

Not For the Average Students

Most of the time students hear that IIT JEE Main or JEE Advanced exams are too tough and that they are very difficult to crack. After hearing such a statement average students feel that the exam can only be cleared by toppers or students with brilliant minds. Yes, the exam is tough but even average students can successfully clear the exams. It all depends on smart preparation along with hard work.

Board Preparation Will Make Things Easy

This is true to some extent. However, students have to realize that these are two distinct exams based on the different exam pattern. They require different levels of preparation. Most of the time students who fall into this trap end up under-performing in the exams.

Study For Long Hours Is A Must

This is totally a wrong concept. Yes JEE requires students to put in the extra effort but it does not mean that you study for hours and hours all night long. Students will only exhaust themselves and it even might lead to the dullness of the mind. Planning a suitable timetable is key and students should have a good focus when they study. Regular breaks should be taken in between and engage in fun activities as it will help students remain motivated. Meanwhile, study hours should not be compared with the success rate.

Make Use Of More And More Study Resources

It is important to refer to additional resources like NCERT books or HC Verma solutions among others. However, it will not be beneficial if students are not able to finish reading all the books on time and more resources could also mean students getting confused. Time is a valuable thing and students should stick to the right resources. Engage in solving more of question papers while keeping less number of books.

Studying In The Best Coaching Institute Can Help You Crack JEE

Yes, taking coaching can help students to some extent but the fact is that it all depends on how seriously the student takes the exam. They need to be goal oriented and work smartly at the same time to succeed in the exam.

These are some of the things that students should be aware of and avoid them in order to excel in the exam. Meanwhile, students who are interested to learn more about JEE and at the same time get access to interesting learning content they can check out BYJU’S YouTube channel and subscribe to it.

5 Tips to Take Care of your Skin

Okay, so if you guys are not already aware, I recently got married. And yes, there are going to be loads of post about it, if at all you guys are interested to know about it!

Mine was not a wedding carnival but an extended celebration for sure. And I, of course, had to look my personal best. Few things which I have learned about taking care of skin during this amazing time is something I am going to share today in this post. 

Everybody dreams of flawless and acne free skin. You are happy, excited or else stressed; your face shows it off. As per experts, you can stay beautiful if you take care of your skin on a regular basis. You have to pamper yourself on a daily basis to stay beautiful.

Having said that, I don’t mean that you HAVE to look beautiful. I just want you to feel beautiful and be comfortable in your own skin. Just keep your skin healthy. 

1. Avoid sun exposure

One of the best ways to stay beautiful and preventing your skin from all kind of damage is to apply sunscreen with SPF. SPF should be 15 which help together from UVB and UVA rays and you can easily buy sunscreen using Nykaa Sale offer. I usually use an SPF 30+ for my hands and body and SPF 70 for my face because I live in Hyderabad and here the sun is worse than Delhi. Avoiding sun exposure is the perfect way to take care of your skin. In this way, you can prevent your skin from any damages such as age spots, wrinkles along with numerous other skin problems. By protecting your skin from sun rays you will offer it a long life, just make sure that the sunscreen you choose should be according to your skin type. It should avoid labels such as non-acnegenic or noncomedogenic so that it should not block your skin pores. Always put on the sunscreen when you go outside, whether it is cloudy or else cold or any other climate but you should not avoid applying it. When you are on a beach enjoying holidays you have to use a sunscreen with SPF 30 to take care of your skin. 

Style statements are good with hats and glasses but sunscreens are a must!

2. Remove makeup before going to bed

I have learned this the hard way. Don’t ever go to bed with your makeup on as it will ruin your skin and will damage it from the roots. Always make sure to clean up your makeup before hitting sheets and let your skin to breathe overnight. Leaving make-up on your skin will clog your pores and which results in blackheads. No need to use the make remover for this, instead use olive oil or else coconut oil to remove makeup. Just use a cotton ball to remove, makeup and dirt with the help of oils. If you have oily skin, you can use micellar water too. Exfoliation is the must which should be done twice a week to remove dust. It is the best you can do for your skin and which will offer you brighter and healthy skin. You can also exfoliate your skin by applying a paste of walnut along with yogurt as antioxidants in walnuts will work wonders and also promote radiant skin.

3. Eat Healthily

Choosing what you should eat to take care of your skin is necessary. You should carefully decide what you should consume and what you should avoid. Including greens, fresh fruits, vitamins as well as protein in your daily diet will offer you healthier skin. Taking care of your skin promotes radiant skin, and for this, you should consume a diet fully packed with vitamin C. 

All you need is an abundance of vital nutrients. 

4. Take enough sleep

Taking care of skin requires a proper routine which includes at least eight hours of sleep every night. Your skin shows what you experience and if you don’t get time to rest you will get a tired skin automatically. To heal tired skin, you can also apply a honey mask twice a week to get a smooth and fresh look. As per skin experts, you have to wash your face and remove your makeup daily before going to bed, and if you have dry skin, you should use mild cleansers and have to apply a lot of moisturizers to stay hydrated. Avoiding hot water on dry skin is vital as it will dry out your skin more.

5. Exercise often

Did you notice that after exercising your skin glows? It may be tired or sweaty, but it glows. It is a fact that exercising regularly not only benefits your overall health but offers a glowing and healthy skin too. Sweating after a workout is the best way for clearing skin as it assists your sweat to remove toxins. Exercising also offers muscle toning and which ultimately leads to healthier skin. Post-workout glow is what you get when you exercise. By exercising on a daily basis your skin starts producing natural oils and which maintain your skin to moisturize naturally and so receives an excellent dose of oxygenated blood.

It’s very much difficult to protect your skin from the harsh environment, but if you take care of your skin on a daily basis you will for sure get rewards of your efforts.

How to deal with stress at work?

No matter how hard we try, stress is something that is unavoidable. The major source of stress, believe it or not, is surprisingly our professional zone. Which means, it is our work that is making our brain go haywire and stressful!

If you are happy in your workplace and are happy with the work you do, nothing like it. But a stressful work environment affects your life after you come back home.

But if you learn a few effective tips to cope with stress while you are working, it can help you feel better. Here’s how you can tackle stress at your workplace.

Understanding the triggers of your stress

First things first, we are all different human beings and all of us react in a different way to different situations. Our years of experience and our personality also plays some role in the way we deal with particular situations. Things which bother you might not affect your colleagues at all. Or your brain might be sensitive to a few situations causing more stress.

Hence, it is necessary for you to understand your triggers. Try and identify them. What you can do to identify is, give yourself some time, learn when and where your mind switches off or feels extremely vulnerable. Start recording those events. There will be moments when you feel the worst – you feel negative about yourself, emotionally you feel tired and so on while you work. Notice them.

Try to analyze the stressful situations. Who all were there? Is it the presence of a few people who make your surroundings negative? How did you react to the situation? Were you impulsive? Could you have acted differently? Or are there things around work that make you feel stressed at work? Is it because you travel for around 2 hours to reach office? Or do you feel difficulties in accepting criticisms? Or is the fear of losing a job? Identify them.

Try to take care of your stress triggers

After you learn about the trigger points, the next thing is to tackle it effectively. The best way to deal with triggers is to legitimately find a way to change the circumstance that is causing you stress. Let’s say you always leave early from office leaving your work behind to pick your kid from school. Employers will allow this to happen once or twice, but it happens regularly, no one will feel good about it. In fact, you will start feeling guilty about it and affect your personal life as well. But there is a solution to this – like talking to the neighbors who can pick your kid and drop him or her safely to your home. Also, if your company allows you to take work home, you can try doing that too. This way, you will be able to finish your work daily and submit it to your manager the very next day.

Time management is the key to everything

Another possible reason to feel stressed is not being able to manage your time properly. Many people in the workplace, unfortunately, fail to deal with time management effectively. Time management is essential, this helps you to complete your work on time and maintaining your cool even under pressure.

This is what you need to do:

Step 1: Set your goals beforehand. Every day is a new day for you. Sit with your managers and decide your daily goals. Don’t set unexpected goals. Finish them daily and review them to ensure that everything is right.

Step 2: Always prepare a list. You will have always have urgent work. Mark them as your priority. Distribute your work in order and finish them one by one. But, make sure to finish your priority work first.

Speak to your colleagues and managers
Jobs can get extremely stressful once a while. You might feel that your job is taking a toll on your life and you are no longer able to handle it. Unfortunately, this is when people quit their job even if they don’t want to. If nothing works, then maybe quitting could be the last option. But think, isn’t every job stressful?

The best way to deal with office stress is to sit with your trusted colleagues and manager. Tell them that you are facing challenges. Let them know that you need help. They might be in a position to sort it out for you.

Take a break

Another thing to keep your calm is to take a break when required. Don’t push yourself too hard. Even a few minutes of break in between work can help your mood to feel refreshed. Have a sip of coffee or just walk in the corridor.

Also, once you know that now you can take a vacation, take it. And don’t take your work along with you on your vacation. A vacation is required every now and then to break the monotonous routine. You are a human being too and you do need a break. Think about it. Let your manager know that you wish to take a break after completing a project.

Taking breaks are super important. But always remember that there is a thin line between a break and escape!

Book a ticket to Kerala and use goomo coupons. Exciting offers can also help you feel good. To uplift your mood right away, do visit CouponsCurry for more deals.

Few last words

Do seek professional help when you feel negative about everything. Job stress is a huge thing and when you fail to cope with it effectively, don’t hesitate to talk to a professional. Counseling can help you to deal with your stress and anxiety effectively.

10 Must-do Things for First Time Travellers in Dubai

**This post is a prologue to my travelogue to Dubai**

*This post is penned down with a help of a very amazing girl Neha. An avid trekker, explorer and a true foodie; Neha finds happiness in small endeavors of life and loves to pen them down as a cherished memory. A firm believer that “we have just one life to live and so much to do”, Neha lives every moment to the fullest.*

From a simple fishing and pearl-diving village, Dubai has today become a modern city of epic proportions. With impressive skyscrapers, magnificent manmade marvels, mysterious deserts, captivating culture and ancient history, Dubai can overwhelm the first-time visitor. Let us simplify Dubai for you by listing the 10 must-see attractions and must-do activities. Taste the incredible variety that Dubai can offer, and soon you’ll be planning another trip to the city to savor the rest!

Though I will be sharing a detailed post on Dubai you know that any of my travel posts are incomplete without the travel tips. So, here you go:

  1. Pay attention to the dress code in the area you’re in and dress accordingly. For example, at mosques, men must cover their shoulders and legs, while women must cover their whole bodies and their hair
  2. Swimsuits are appropriate only at beaches. Going topless is not allowed even at the most modern beaches
  3. See-through clothing and clothing that allows underwear to be seen are a strict no-no
  4. The dress code is more liberal at malls, but it’s best to avoid revealing clothes and mini-skirts, as these are still frowned upon

Grand Must-see and Must-do Things for First Timers to Dubai
1. Burj Khalifa

Burj Khalifa is literally the epicenter of Dubai’s extravagant lifestyle. Standing at 828 meters, this huge building is still the tallest building in the world. Visit the observatory deck on the 124th floor of the Burj Khalifa and enjoy a fabulous view of Dubai and the vast desert. You can see as far as the distant Persian Gulf. There are telescopes placed at regular intervals to help you focus on different landmarks in the city. If you want to, you can sign up for the views from both observatory decks – the one on the 125th floor and the one on the 148th floor which offers an even better view. This is undoubtedly my favorite place.

Dubai gave me some of my favourite back-shots! 

2. Old Dubai 

If you want to get close to Dubai’s origins, visit the Al Fahidi Historic Neighbourhood, a well-preserved slice of Old Dubai. Explore the mazes of abandoned cobbled streets and narrow pathways containing old homes made out of black coral. Observe the way the old wind towers were constructed to keep homes cool in those days. Be sure to visit the souqs of Bur Dubai and bargain for spices and gold. Cross the Dubai Creek in an abra and explore the souqs of Deira – selling perfumes, carpets and textiles. I stayed in old Dubai for good days to explore the by-lanes of this amazing city.

3. The Shopping Malls Of Dubai

You cannot visit Dubai and not shop! Dubai has been designed for shopping. Remember my post? Be sure to check out the main shopping malls – Dubai Mall with its 1200 plus retail outlets. To name a few,  the Ibn Battuta Mall, the Emirates Mall and the Dubai Marina Mall are few of the iconic malls of Dubai. You can buy just about anything in Dubai – from designer goods to electronics to jewelry to spices to top-quality foodstuffs and souvenirs. What’s more, you’ll actually find a “Gold to Go” ATM at Dubai Mall that lets you purchase gold in exchange for money.

The malls! 

4. Desert Safari

Sign up for a desert safari and head to the Dubai desert in your tour operator’s luxurious 4×4. During daytime Dubai desert safaris you can enjoy desert sports such as camel riding, dune bashing, sand boarding, and quad biking. During evening and overnight safaris, you can enjoy desert sports plus cultural entertainment programs followed by a fabulous Emirati dinner. A detailed account is to follow!

Dubai Safari was one of the most amazing travel adventures I have ever had! 
5. Ski Dubai

Yes, there are indoor ski resorts in the world but nowhere where the sun blazes as hot as it does in Dubai. A ski resort in Dubai feel incongruous but only till you step inside. This ginormous ski resort is many football fields large. Several tall ice mountains have been constructed with multiple ski slopes designed to fit different levels of skiing proficiency. There’s even a Diamond Run of 400 meters here. You can go skiing, tobogganing, have a snow fight, build a snowman, play with penguins in the penguin’s park, or hide out in the ice cave. 

The above five are probably some things which are very unique to Dubai only. Though there are many other things to do to, which I will be covering soon. Meanwhile, I am telling about five more things which are on my list. Yes, I am visiting Dubai again – and the following are the reasons (apart from shopping, of course) for that!

6. La Mer Beach

You cannot visit Dubai and not enjoy one of its hippest beachfront destinations. Explore the many fancy restaurants, shops and the long, long beach with white sands and crystal clear water.  You can sunbathe, swim and even go banana boating at La Mer beach. After the sun goes down, La Mer becomes a lively spot for nightlife. ANd trust me, Dubai nightlife is super happening!

7. The Mosques of Dubai

I loved the Grand Mosque in Abu Dhabi. Note to self for the next visit –  Take the time to learn about Dubai’s Islamic culture and visit some of the city’s beautiful mosques. Dubai’s mosques are impressive – the architecture, the design, and the ambiance are all designed just for the worship of Allah. Be sure to visit Jumeirah Mosque, which is open to people from all religions. The Jumeirah Mosque adorns the 500 dirham banknote in Dubai as well. Visit the Al Farooq Omar Bin Al Khattab Mosque, known as the Blue Mosque, since it resembles Istanbul’s Blue Mosque.

8. Dubai Garden Glow

Dubai Garden Glow is a fabulous theme park that’s specially created during winter in Dubai. The park is open only from November to April the next year. This year the Dubai Garden Glow has put up some remarkable displays. For starters, the Ice Park feels like another world with fantastic ice sculptures and structures – created out of 5000 tons of ice by 150 artists. The biggest dinosaur park in the world has 100 animatronic dinosaurs that pounce, growl and move realistically. You can also explore the Dinosaur Museum’s collection of skeletons in the Dino Lab. The Glow Park is an illuminated park with a fascinating glowing underwater world.

9. IMG Worlds of Adventure

These are completely my type of places! IMG Worlds of Adventure is Dubai’s serenade to the world of childhood. Here, various zones bring cartoon network characters to life. For example, the Flintstones corner has a real animatronic Dino, a real stone car and real stone-age characters. There are zones for the Powerpuff Girls, Bugs Bunny, and several other cartoon characters. There are rides, rollercoasters, immersive shows and programs in this ginormous, several football-fields large incredible IMG Worlds of Adventure. 

10. Camel Racing 

The last(and maybe the least!) on my list is camel racing. Camel racing is one of the traditional sports of the Emiratis. Though I hate the torture on animals, I really have to know more about this one because interestingly, there are no jockeys on these camels but robots. Small robots sit on them, and are controlled by people holding remotes. The camel owners follow them on air-conditioned luxury 4WDs, holding the remote controllers, manipulating the robots driving the camels. The camel-racing tracks are very big. There’s room enough for the camels and the luxury vehicles following them. The atmosphere is contagious – there’s high excitement and million-dollar wagers are on, for the camel in the lead. It’s definitely one of the must-do things in Dubai for first-timers. 

As a first-timer, you’ll be in awe of Dubai, and the places and activities we’ve listed will only whet your appetitive for more. Dubai is a fascinating city that offers you more excitement, each time you visit. Be sure to pack your bags and visit the city again – who knows what awaits you then?

10 Unhealthy Ways of Dealing with Anxiety and Stress

In today’s fast-paced world, there are many aspects of life that cause stress or anxiety from time to time. It’ is something that many people suffer from, and unfortunately, most don’t know how to deal with it. This results in reduced performance at work or school, strained relationships, poor quality sleep and even deteriorating health.

It is not something to shy away from. The only thing that you should do is seek help – from friends or from some professional, but do talk to someone about it. 
But there are few things which you should avoid doing – and trust me, I know it is not deliberate even if you do these things – but a conscious effort for your own health is something that you can always put in. 
I write this because I probably have done everything and I have achieved nothing but become poorer by health, money and friends. The only thing that helps, in the end, is acceptance and reaching out to people.

1. Overindulging In Alcohol
For most people, alcohol always helps to make the pain, stress or anxiety go away. What they refuse to realize, however, drinking to cope with anxiety and stress only happens to postpone it. Drowning worries in alcohol don’t solve anything. It might even escalate the issue due to the regrettable decisions you might make when intoxicated.

2. Smoking
Smoking has been termed as a stress reliever by some critics, but the amount of damage that it does to your internal organs is horrible and not worth it. It has adverse effects on your lungs, as it severely increases the chances of getting lung cancer. On top of all that, once it becomes a habit, it is very difficult to quit.

3. Isolation
Keeping to yourself when anxious or stressed out only means you’re creating more time to focus on the wrong issues. This is because you’re more likely to drown in self-doubt and self-pity when you’re by yourself and not doing much. Instead, try and make sure that you’re involved in some form of activity, and not just staying in bed all day and night. This might even lead to depression.

4. Impulse spending

While getting new stuff might come with that initial high, it’ll only be a matter of time before you’re back to feeling anxious or stressed out. This might end up hurting a lot in the future. Also spending compulsively might get one into financial issues, adding one more entry on the list of things to be stressed about.

5. Screwing up your eating habits

Comfort foods might seem like harmless treats that are sure to make you feel better, but the truth is you’re going to regret eating all that food after realizing how bad you look after gaining weight! No kidding, but these foods characteristically taste good due to their high amounts of sugar, and they also come bundled with a high-calorie count or high-fat content. On the other end, under-eating can cause serious fatigue and concentration problems, so it’s always good to maintain a balanced diet.

6. Prescription Drugs

Prescription drugs are known to provide some level of relief, but they don’t really get to the root cause of the issue. Sure, you could go for sleeping pills, muscle relaxers, and the equivalent, but this is only a temporary solution to a more deeply seated problem. On the other hand, if you overindulge on these drugs, you stand a risk of developing some other serious health-related issues.

7. Consuming Too Much Caffeine

With caffeine being a normal part of most people’s morning routine, there might be the temptation to overindulge so as to sustain the high level of alertness and ability to focus. This is also one form of a temporary solution since all it does is postpone your stress and anxiety. Consuming too much coffee might end up disrupting one’s sleeping cycle, leading to lower productivity levels.

8. Overworking

Another way that stressed out people use to run away from their problems is overworking. The issue with this is too much work without sufficient rest leads to a decrease in the quality of work done. This later causes problems with your employer, leading to a more hostile working environment. All this does is increase your stress levels, since you start worrying about how much longer you’ll get to keep your job.

9. Being Negative
Dwelling on the worst-case scenario only makes it more difficult to remain calm since all energy is directed to all the bad things that can happen. This adds to the levels of stress and anxiety that a person may already be experiencing. Surrounding yourself with positive people can help lift your spirits, and even deal with whatever issues you’re having.

10. Ignoring the Issue

Pretending that a problem does not exist where it does is the single worst way to go about dealing with stress and anxiety. What will happen is that the issue will only become harder to overcome and result in habits that you would be much better off without.

This article is written with the help of Patrick Bailey. Patrick is a professional writer mainly in the fields of mental health, addiction, and living in recovery. He attempts to stay on top of the latest news in the addiction and the mental health world and enjoys writing about these topics to break the stigma associated with them. You can reach out to him by the following means:

Email ID: baileypatrick780@gmail.com
Website / Blog URL: http://patrickbaileys.com
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Pat_Bailey80
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/patrick-bailey-writer

Being Smart! #GetFitFlipkart

Do you remember the movie Back to the Future? I never imagined that the “future” will be here so soon! I never really thought I will see such an advanced way of living life in my lifetime.

Just when I thought that ordering everything online – from food to clothes to spa services to self-driven cars – is revolutionary, I, in no time, found myself fiddling with the smart home devices. I am super dependent on my Google Assistant for everything.

But this comes with two major drawbacks. First, there are a lot of questions about security. Hell yes, I am worried too but then I rationally think that who will gain what by getting information about my whereabouts. As long as your financial details are secure, I think it’s okay to leave an online footprint.

Secondly, it makes you super lazy probably. You are having everything at your fingertips so yes, a sedentary lifestyle is given. But then, the smart wearables are a good way to keep track of your workouts and physical activities. I don’t know if you are aware of the Google Fit Challenge but that is something which will help you keep in check that you are being optimally physically active. I make sure that I complete my 10K steps every day. Plus, these watches are pretty nice accessories! I mean I really love my watch!

Also, I love it how my home is voice controlled now. Smart Homes for the win! I still remember how I used to feel so lazy to get up to switch off the lights after finishing my book at night. Now, it’s just about saying “Okay Google, switch off the lights!”

Being a slave to the technology is fine as long as we know that we are not misusing it. So, be smart, no?

This is how, presently, our life is completely ruled by technology – for good and for our ease!

This post is written for a contest hosted by IndiBlogger in association with Flipkart #SmartHomeRevolution.

Happy New Year!

For the very first time, I did not have any expectations from the new year. In fact, it did not feel like a new year. And very first lesson that I (re)learned in 2019 is that expect or not, if life has to disappoint you, it will – no matter what. So, when they say that only expectations hurt, it is not true.

However, I am not really starting off this year on a negative note. The year 2018 was pretty eventful in every sense. I am not really sure if it was a good year or not but I saw and learned a lot. I saw myself change for good. One, I learned the beauty of being thankful and grateful for everything that I have in life. I saw myself really complaining less about the things that I don’t have – or may be I stopped giving any flying worries to them. Second, I have become more patient with things which are not completely in my control.

I really don’t have many expectations from this year but yes, I hope I see some major changes – good or bad – but definitely whatever is required to make me grow! Phew, such stupid and heavy words.

And that is enough about me. I really, with all my heart and soul, pray that everyone on this planet gets what they deserve (at the right time) in the year that has just started. I don’t know about the new-year-new-me concept but I really hope that you are able to do everything that keeps your mind, body and soul content. Chuck that stupid rat race, it is not worth your time and worries. Life is fair in it’s own ways – just have faith.

Sending loads of love and wishing you all a very happy new year.

When you have the Best Boss Ever!

This post took more time than I anticipated! But I have been wanting to post this since I left Delhi(well, is that a news to you?!).

I have been completely MIA because of my relocation to a completely new city. More than any physical fatigue of the relocation (because I practically had to move just one luggage full of clothes), I am emotionally exhausted. And that is the reason I have been keeping away from writing anything. But I have finally realized that writing always keeps my sanity intact.

I have lived in Delhi all my life. Leaving Delhi was a tough decision because I have always stayed in the comfort of my house, moved around conveniently in private vehicles and never really faced any regionalism at all, despite being a Bengali. I miss all of those things. I miss my parents a lot. But I moved to a new city because of a new job. 
The foremost thing that I want right now is settling down in my job. Okay, I am not judging my workplace or my work or my bosses, because it’s too soon. But having an amazing boss in the past makes it very difficult to not to compare your present situation when you shift workplaces. I might soon be attending workshops on how to move on in life without your favourite boss around. 

This post is completely inspired and dedicated to my boss from previous organization. I am going to tell you about how difficult it is to move on when you have worked with the best bosses. I have spent a good amount of time there, despite my present organization being my 5th organization in the last three years. The time I spent in Deloitte was pretty challenging but I had an amazing team to work with and thus things were tolerable. More than teammates, they were the friends who made life pretty easier. Though I had times when I worked with people who were not the best of leaders, however my team’s bosses were pretty amazing and probably the reason why I find it difficult to move on so soon!

I miss being around them! 
The comfort of having a gang to always share your joys and sorrows! 

And this was the team where I met the boss who inspired me to write this post. In short, everything that I ever believed a good boss should be made of is compiled below. I hope my professional journey helps me identify and add more qualities to the list – and if at all I plan to work long, emerge as a good boss myself.

And in this section of my post, I am going to talk about my previous boss Varun, without who’s presence I wouldn’t have known ever, what a great boss is all about!  He was the one who took my interview and on-boarded me into his team. He already had a wonderfully team with people who ended up being my closest of the friends.
Varun has literally helped in shaping the image of a “good boss” in my head. Whenever there had been a blocker, like when I was very new and had no clue how simple things like Excel work, he had spent time with me making me understand things, rather than judging me or being condescending towards me for not knowing it. He has always been very motivating.

He always made sure that your one failure doesn’t demotivate you or pulls you back. He is someone who will have faith in you and gives you time to grow.

Another great thing about him is that he has always been someone who has treated his team members as humans and not just mere resources, which is by the way a common culture in consulting. He connects with people at a personal level. When I say that I mean that it is always a pleasant feeling to know that your manager takes interest in you as an individual. It means a lot, at least for me personally, when a boss actually encourages yours interests and hobbies. It always made me feel amazing when Varun used to read my blogs and appreciated them! 

Varun also shares his life and struggles too, both professional and personal. I feel that is also one of the good things about an awesome boss – shows the vulnerable side of a person and makes your manager all the more human.

With him, work was always fun. While I was around, I know that Varun made sure that life doesn’t get monotonous and too strenuous even when the projects involved lot of high pressure and tough deadlines. In short, he is fun to work with! He makes sure that the environment is always healthy to work in! 

I look completely high and stoned in this picture. But then again, this is one of my favourite pictures!

Varun is the kind of manager who knows what kind of deliverable is to be given when. He has a clear vision, mostly, and makes sure that he also respects the sensible and reasonable opinions of his sub ordinates. And all this because he is knowledgable enough to do that.

He is always open enough to welcome every idea, without being the “boss” boss. 

Being my manager, he did set clear expectations and goals for me, which definitely helped me grow as a professional. His consistent feedbacks were a constantly helpful in making me aware of the my shortcomings. And that way, I believed he managed to build a very good team with very less communication blocks among everyone.

All this, because he has worked in these kind of set up for more than a decade now.

I am thankful that my first real job in the world of consulting had him as my mentor. I have learned to appreciate the work I do, enjoy while I work and excel in whatever I do!

Thanks Varun 🙂

Source: Someecards

Anxiety and Insecurity.

This box… 

Pretty and made of dreams
 from the outside,
keeping me trapped inside.
Confined emptiness is all I see.
My limbs are immobile,
my neck, strained. 
My head aches 
and wonders what keeps me inside 
a weak and small box. 
My heard pounds as I grasp for breath
and hope of freedom. 
Crushing all my rationality,
Crippling my practicality and
Breaking all of me
This box is called anxiety. 

Do you also find yourself doubting yourself all the time? Are you also convinced that things are never going to be right and feel like cribbing all the time WHEN you know that it is not required?

I don’t intend to talk about only anxiety and upsetting things, but this is the only way apparently when I feel a li’l relaxed. I don’t even know what I talk about but this is just an attempt to tell people, if at all they stumble upon this blog, that probably they ain’t alone.

This post is just a page right out of my daily journal and can be a true reflection of my scattered  thoughts! Damn, I miss being sorted!

Usually, people who are insecure in general tend to brag about their achievements because yes, they are certainly trying to convince themselves. And that is more of an inherent nature than anything else – like  I am an inherently a sad person. 

However, when you are having anxiety disorders, being insecure is a whole new story. 

I am not worried about convincing myself that I am doing good in life because I am not. I find myself cribbing about everything around me and that too when I know I am not supposed to. It’s like a critical inner voice always telling me to appreciate things and not appreciate the same things at the same time. 

Off lately, I see myself being very insecure about almost everything in life. It’s not just a general fear of losing my near and dear ones but also insecurity about everything – I feel insecure about my body in general, I feel insecure about leaving my parents behind in a different city, I feel insecure as a working professional. And these thoughts make me anxious constantly. I don’t know if my insecurities are a cause of my anxiety or it’s my anxiety which makes me insecure all the time. 

I find myself consumed by these thoughts forever and thus find myself not at all productive – in any aspect of life. 

There is someone inside my head always telling me that I am a failure and that keeps me from doing anything. I anticipate the outcome(me being a failure) and then refrain from working and putting any efforts in the task that I have in hand. Though I am lucky enough to be able to talk about these feelings and probably pretty strong too when it comes to evaluating the situation and telling myself not to give up, I really feel worried about the people who are facing the similar issues and their environment is as hostile as can be. 

I know something is terribly wrong with me because I am not the same person as I used to be. I have started to pull back myself from social events because what the hell, I am such a loser to hang out with anyone. I have lost all the confidence that I used to have. In workplace, I tend to be driven by my own self sabotaging thoughts of being not acknowledged or appreciated. In fact, I am always under some kind of invisible pressure coming from an unknown source. 

I dwell on to the past a lot. I let my past experiences rule my present so much that I have literally closed the doors for any new experience to leave a good thing to look back to in the future. Or may be, I just don’t want to get over the sad things of life. 

The only thing I am doing right now is to deliberately fight my inner voice that pulls me down. It is an emotional battle but I hope to get over it soon. If there is any other way to combat the insecurities, please let me know. 

Of Chaos, Anxiety and Panic Attacks.

It’s not a Monday. It’s a Tuesday. Yet, I find it as difficult as a Monday morning to drag myself out of my bed to welcome the new day. Welcome? No, not really. My activity tracker says I have slept for six hours which is better than 73% of the people. But I am still tired. I somehow manage to pull myself together for my daily routines – out of which none of them demands heavy physical activity. I don’t take any caffeine to activate myself. I am good without it. I am sitting in my usual chair thinking about how my life is suddenly so mundane. But is this a sudden change? Or I let myself drown in the negativity which is omnipresent? Trying hard to bring all the good and positive things in my mind to drag through the day so that I can reach the best place – the night – as soon as I can, forgetting that time runs at the same pace, I suddenly feel my heart beat increasing. I have no control. I can feel blood rush up to my cheeks and my ears. I can sense my ears getting hotter. I suddenly have this urge to burst into tears. I am breathing heavily. I don’t have any control over this. My hands are sweaty. No, I don’t like sweat. What is happening to me?

Is it an anxiety attack? No. I was blank. I was not thinking about anything-anything to stress about. Is it a panic attack? I don’t know. 

This is not the story of just Tuesdays but all other days of my life. It happens during any time of the day. ANY TIME. And I am not enjoying them. I don’t like this space that is engulfing me in the darkness. But I feel so helpless. There is so much of chaos in my head. People say I should reach out and talk to people. But I don’t know where should I start from. And even if I figure that out, I fear that I might just break down. Break down so bad that there is no looking back.

I don’t like these sudden attacks which make me feel like a completely vulnerable and dependent creature. I don’t like the struggle of dealing with these attacks alone. I don’t like to hide what I am going through. I don’t want to show that either. I just want them to stop.
Am I overthinking? Is it just a phase? Life is never a bed of roses, so should I just stay calm and let things fall into place? No. I have been doing all these for so long now that I have become too immune to them.

I somehow have this feeling that I am not alone. Of course, I am not. We all have our own sets of troubles which we don’t show. Some of us deal with them. Some of us can not. That doesn’t make anyone weak. To many, my life is perfect. To me, it is perfect too. But then, why am I too chaotic to control? Why do I have to pull off this drama?

Well, whoever said that having the possessions which give you the worldly pleasures are more important than mental peace, he/she was wrong at so many levels. If your life, at any point in time, makes you feel incomplete, you know you are going wrong somewhere.

I like to call anxiety chaos. There is too much to define and defend. Anxiety is everything but cute. Anxiety is not a phase. It surely ain’t okay. And I am done with making anyone understand that. The struggle is real. You are not talking to someone who is against you. You are talking to your own brain which is fundamentally you. The weird and chaotic feelings just don’t go away by saying “chill”. No, they don’t. 

Escaping everything seems like the best solution. But is it? Even during those escapes, the fear of being alone and paranoid breaks you from inside. Anxiety makes you do things or say things which you would never say or do.  Anxiety pushes you down into that never-ending pit of guilt. The guilt of not being strong enough to help yourself. But that is not true. Every step you take to make yourself feel comfortable, even if it fails, is the sign of you being strong.

It can be exhausting. It is indeed. It is demotivating. It is so demotivating that it effects you in everything you do. But you don’t feel like doing anything about it because nothing seems worth. And this battle of picking yourself up to motivate yourself is a battle that you have to fight with yourself.

I feel physically weak. I feel physically unattractive. And all of you who say that I am giving myself excuses to not to do anything by bringing up anxiety issues, I really have no words against you. I feel so demotivated that probably I will just believe you. I have lost the vigour to fight – fight to make anyone see that what my mental battle is. 

Anxiety issues are never good for a relationship. It is a struggle to communicate your hows and whys to your other half.

It is hard to communicate with my other half and it makes my head act up. Sometimes, my attacks are triggered by him without him knowing. Or even without me knowing. I struggle with those fears of losing out on someone important because of something over which I don’t have control. I love him – for his patience and everything else. I know I can’t take him for granted. But I can not deal with my issues either. I can not justify my indifference or lack of emotions because there are no reasons. 

Finding a support system is difficult but not impossible. Family and friends are there. Reaching out to them is possible too. But yes, not easy.

I have a loving family. They are my happy place. But sometimes, even they can’t really connect with my odd behaviour. I am sorry for what my anxiety makes me do or say.  But I am being grateful for them being around. 

If you look around, you will see a lot of people fighting these battle. Maybe you are too. And it is okay to be in a need of help. Seek it. Just like I am trying to do that right now by pouring out my chaotic thoughts here. You might have a different way of doing it. Try it out. But the last thing you would want to do to a person with anxiety issues is trivializing the matter. If you don’t know what to say, don’t act like an expert. Rather find an expert who can help.

The good thing about people who are sailing in the same boat as mine is that they understand. They don’t demean anyone because they know how it feels. They don’t complain. They accept things. They don’t compare their misery with anyone. They won’t magnify their issue because they don’t seek sympathy. They seek help. They need help.

Yes, everyone feels anxious – job interviews, first dates. But anxiety attacks, or rather panic attacks, are something which has no reason. There are no explanations. It is just a chaos which you can not embrace.

This was an attempt to feel better. I don’t know when will this post see the light of the day but I already feel a li’l more unattached from the feeling of not being understood.